Yes, you've heard me right: cry all your heart out! you pee less...
Crying, tears, sobbing and such are associated nowadays with something tragic, sad or even horrible. If you would ask anyone on the street where do you have the greatest chance see crying people, one of the first answers will be "at funerals". If you would ask me, the first three locations I'd name would be the following: singing lessons, the solitude of a practise room, and during conversations on the phone.
But why do we cry? Why do the salty water comes out of our eyes when the emotions we feel are so overwhelming that we cannot help but cry, cry, cry and cry? Frankly, I have no idea, I’m just doing it, and... Oh, wait... you haven’t had such an overwhelming rush of emotions before that you couldn’t help but cry, cry, cry and cry? OK, really, wait a minute, I think this needs some explanation before you’d think I am seriously depressed and that I should go and consult with a Viennese specialist about my mental condition (and that conversation would end up him trying to convince me about the non-existent problem I have with my mother...).
So,just to be clear: in my opinion crying is the most natural way of dealing with stress and a natural sign of the melting emotional blockage. In an earlier entry of mine I've already mentioned F. M. Alexander, saying: "You translate everything - whether physical, mental, or spiritual into muscular tension.". Every single muscular tension caused by some emotional impulse that you cannot release stays in your body in different ways, and they become hard as rocks as time passes by. Now, this wouldn't be much of a problem, if these "rocks" wouldn't cause further problems when it comes to singing. I am saying this, because even the smallest "rock" on your diaphragma can cause malfunction and can prevent you to make connection with you own instrument. When these rocks are melting away, one of the most common signs the thaw is warm, salty water pouring from your eyes, or in other words: crying. The intensity of this can be as diverse as you can imagine. In my case it comes with serious mood-swings, severe pain and deep anguish (I think I partly re-live emotionally the contents of these "rocks").
In the very beginning when these mood-swings and intense crying occured, I seriously thought that I have a serious case of depression. I still remember me sitting at the table with my plate of food and my tears were falling in my food, and I had really no idea why I was even crying. The next time it happened in the middle of practise, and by the time I could calm down and continued practising I felt that everything opened up and they remained open. After this I've asked Heent Prins about me crying a lot, and stuff like that and she said: "It's normal. It's just a sign that the problems (one by one) are solved."
And as she told me this suddenly I remembered one of my first Alexander Technique lessons. I had to imagine something I wanted really badly and also imagining it not taking that by force but by imagining it being rewarded with it and take it gently as something that I deserve (and as something that wants to belong to me). The moment I was able to imagine this I started to cry and couldn't stop the tears for several minutes.
Like this I had 3 confirmations of the fact that crying is good and nothing is wrong with the state of my mind and after that I was sure I won't need a Viennese specialist - ever. The only unpleasant feature of this kind of development and problem-solving is that it can happen anytime and anywhere, and the people around you just freak out and they think something bad happened to you, or your are sad. I think, even if you tell them nothing is wrong and everything is perfect, because of the unstoppable flow of tears nobody will ever believe you (maybe if you explain them hundred times and more, they might grasp a little bit of it, but not more). There was a few weeks when I did not want to meet certain people and I was happy not seeing them, because I would have been so happy about seeing them that I would just instantly have started to cry and I couldn't have been able to explain them properly the whole situation (actually it really does sound like an excuse when you state "everything will be all right" with tears in your eyes, so you cannot even blame them...). But now regardless this fear of mine, I don't care about their doubts, I am sure this works for me, and I am sure it works for everyone else as well.
So just go on, cry all your heart out! You pee less...
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